“Stop crowding me you guys,” Jeff growled at his new roommates, “or I’ll give you all two black eyes.”
“Where are you going, Jeff?”
“I’m tired of your stupid jokes, Gary. I can’t take it anymore. I’m moving out.”
“But.. but that would make us..”
“That’s right — split peas.”
“Hey, Jeff, guess what we are?”
“This is not a good time, Gary. We’re in real trouble here.”
“Yeah, I know! We’re two peas and a cephalopod!”
“I hate you so much.”
[ ED. NOTE: Angela has spent the day consoling poor Jeff. The little guy has nowhere to go, so I told her that he could stay here for a while so long as HEY IS THAT MY MUG? NO WAY IS HE STAYING IN MY MUG, ANGELA. ]
“Hey, Jeff?”
“I’m trying to take a nap here, Gary.”
“You know what we are?”
“Getting weary of this joke, maybe?”
“We’re two peas in a vanilla pod!”
“I’m going to kill you in your sleep.”
“Hey Jeff!”
“I am in pain here, Gary. Please don’t.”
“You know what we are?”
“Please. Don’t.”
“We’re two peas in a podiatrist’s office!”
“I want a new roommate.”